So what does it mean for you to be consistent? It means that you are sticking to the task at hand and you are following through. If what you do is working, there is no need to change your approach just because the latest TV relationship expert, billionaire, or fitness guru says so. Consistency is about you being regular and steady. For example, when a friend is consistent in a relationship (keeping in touch regularly, showing up after making plans, being true to their word), this person will be a strong and stable long-term partner for you.
Consistency is a combination of behaviors that include being dependable, acting in a trustworthy way, and having a true desire to succeed in the relationship whether that be with someone or with yourself. It is pretty obvious that people who are more consistent with their interactions with one another, such as having predictable behaviors and clear communication, have deeper and more successful relationships. The same can be true with people who are consistent in their own personal actions. If an individual can be consistent with themselves, they create a natural confidence that they can depend on and become more successful in all areas of their lives.
A little consistency each day goes a long way. Let’s examine exercise. To be successful in the gym, consistency is the key. If you workout out one day and then “call it a day” it will never give you the result you are after. In fact, if going to the gym isn’t typically something that you do regularly, your body will push back. That push back is the obstacle that you must push through to be consistent. In this case, if your approach is consistent moderation, you can do it again and again. If you have been consistent and have not burned yourself out at the gym, overtime you make measurable progress.
This same principle of consistency should be applied to each relationship in your life, including the one you have with yourself. No relationship is too small to ignore when it comes to consistency. The way relationships build is through constant contact of some kind, that makes progress for all involved. Here are a few key tips to ensure consistency in your relationships:
Stop bragging. We all have a million particles per second rolling around in our brains, that we are trying to make sense of. It is easy to get caught up in our own situations. When we open our mouths and if the first words we start with are “Me” or “I”; we most likely have already tuned our audience out. It is easy to get carried away with trying to justify our own thoughts, especially when talking with others. When we start with the word “I”, the person we are speaking to normally shuts down. They shut down not because they don’t like us but because the content is not about them. Once we start bragging our audience naturally ends up drifting into their imagination while we are speaking. (Notice the start of this blog in the first paragraph. The word “you” is used 7 times. The word "I" is used zero times. If you are still reading, it worked)
Don’t start behavior patterns that you can’t maintain. If you can’t keep it up, don’t set the expectation. We all aspire to be better but we need to be honest with ourselves. Committing to that new goal is a wonderful feeling but are you honest with yourself about what it takes to consistently follow through? If not, enjoy the feeling but move on to something within reach, that you know you can do consistently.
Don’t pretend to love anything that you don’t love. If you hate riding motorcycles don’t buy a bike and patch up with a club for superficial reasons. Eventually you’ll stop riding and participating in club activities, and other members will wonder, “What happened to the riding buddy that the club loved so much?"
Search for a better understanding of what people around you like and keep doing those things. If you can identify things that you enjoy doing that are inline with the lives of others, not only do they win but you win as well.
Don’t be a slacker. It really doesn’t matter what the reason or action is, there is always a way to be more consistent in your approach. Maybe it is using your super cool phone and scheduling todos to keep in touch with your group. It could be in the form of making sure that you are doing your morning exercise routine before all else, to ensure you are getting it done.
There is an unlimited way to up your consistency game. Once we can get past the misunderstandings in our own awareness, we can find the truth in each situation and/or person. When we have identified the truth in the moment, we can operate in cruise control as long as we are consistent in our own actions.
John “Wyld Stile” Larson